Really Bloggy

October 31, 2019: A slowly moving cold front is to produce slightly strong winds and snow is forecast to fall in the middle of the afternoon. During the Time when people are supposed to be asking for candy (a Halloween tradition) the cold and wind should make for temperatures to feel as cold as 20 degrees Fahrenheit or about negative five to negative six degrees celsius. During that Time, major thunderstorms are likely near the Atlantic Ocean in parts of the Eastern United States

While Washington state and Australia has been experiencing record cold, one area of South America has been having warmth well above one hundred degrees, about a little more than a month before the start of summer and it's been above one hundred for well, a long time.

I started listening to specific Swedish ambient/electronic music (not Swedish House Mafia) and it made things seem ethereal, like using sugar to make bitter foods sweet, the music made bad things incredible!!! thinking about various past events from history such as being born and even things that happened before that is an unusually vivid experience using such music

Sometimes these situations seem to literally last for eternity, sometimes I'd like to be dead now to make them stop!!!

I've read comments on YouTube on videos of army comparisons that have been difficult to read because of how I couldn't handle them. Very traumatic, literally. Disturbing also!!!!

The new music that I found is literally something that could've come from another planet!!!

Map of many stories: A cold front that caused unusual snow in Texas coming towards the eastern States, Alaska to warm up next week to up to about 15 degrees F above average, and Tropical Storm Pablo (formerly the most Northeastern Hurricane on record) near Western Europe all on the same map. What's not shown by the map but also happening in the region are the major hurricane strength winds in California, as well as tall waves on the Great lakes which have washed away sand dunes measuring at least twenty feet tall: the current water levels on Lake Michigan have been about three feet higher than average. Over the year of 2019 so far, there have been several weather anomalies involving lightning, temperature extremes, as well as others. In July 2019, according to an article which I've not found the link to yet, some parts of New Zealand experienced wintertime low temperatures of about 70 degrees or about 20 degrees Celcius. Also in 2019, many major fires spread across the Arctic

I might only be twenty five years of age, but psychologically I've been wanting so often to simply go unconscious. very tired & it's been making me feel like a man who might be soon to die!!!

It's terrifying to think that anyone on this world might be having the same situation that I'm having. It also should send a message: don't indulge in pleasure, and don't be drawn to it much. Late in life you might notice that you feel great, or might be doing great, but there could be people out in the world who you don't know about who might be living out the last times of their life in total desperation, and while you're living your life, you didn't help those types of people. Don't use poorer people as examples of how you should live though.

Google, Microsoft, & now Yahoo as well should be wiped off the internet and never return!!! By never being able to get back into any of my accounts, each associated with at least one of these companies, I've lost the ability to being able to manage my files . No one here seems to understand how much difficulty for me there's been to try and get each of the services to work for me again. Meanwhile, Yahoo website has been posting news that's literally total BS, even news that was disruptive to me that I wish that I'd never seen!!! It's the end of my support of any of the companies, and I won't be buying things such as Pixel phones or Pixel earbuds, etc. as well as Surface tablets/phones and all of that which I consider!!! During the time when I came to know about Google & Microsoft's being essentially the same company (yes, an alliance!), I became deeply upset and infuriated. During the exact same time, the person who told me about it was deeply upset

Much of 2019 has been overwhelming to me, in various ways. For one, there's my failure in life, and also there's been my curiosity for science, as well as my overwhelming obsession to make things go how they truly are supposed to be. During late October, I started reading and listening much about science in general, but mostly about physics. I recently bought a new bought by the famed Japanese physicist & have also reading materials from the past that I never read fully!! One of my favorite YouTube channels has been Seeker. I'm also to get at least one more science book this year, but I'd also like to spread science by giving away science books and/or magazines away to people for their birthdays so that I can receive the science information more quickly, or to let someone else read the stuff that I'd like to read, for me. That way, I can focus more on other stuff other than science as well. Otherwise, I might not have time to read everything that I'd like to

Being alone for years is what I've been terrified of, and being alone is the norm for me. I'm like the time when everything has dried up and withered, and I've come to think that it's okay, knowing that I don't change that.

What has been horrible for me was b eing numb (because while laying in bed), with my hand being jammed between my head and my pillow, not knowing if it's in the correct position and not knowing if my fingers have been broken or not, waiting for the possible pain to come

The reason why things happening in my life never happen in my favor, is because I've been failing in life often initially. and then after the times I failed something had to happen against me, like cause and effect. I don't understand how or why though, it's like unexplained: how does a negative cause lead to a negative effect. In other words, it's like a negative action leading to a negative reaction: in theory, it shouldn't be possible but I've been observing it over many years of my life. And that's how it's been with other things, what is essentially circular reasoning. So much ideas in the world are founded on this type of reasoning. With hatred from various people, combined with strict rules leading me to think that something gravely dangerous will happen because of my failed past, my memory has faded many times and very frequently, so much that I forgot what exactly I was supposed to write to finish this sentence: my psychologically ravaged mind

I don't know what emotions I'm experiencing but It's late at night and I'm in a subdued state, thinking to myself how it's going to be when I go totally insane for the rest of my life because of memories and emotions of mine that no one ever dared help me with...

Some of you might know Scott Huff, at least if you're enough of a geek who's been strolling YouTube too much. For what you are about to read is very rare, and so is an opportunity like this. I initially knew about Steve Huff from watching his well-known camera reviews (although he's also been doing tech reviews in general). Given the fact that B&H sent him a camera at least once for review, he was like the real deal. In fact, his attitude and tone of voice made him seem like a serious reporter, maybe someone who you might see on a major news station. I didn't think much about him for about seven months or more, until October of 2019, when I indirectly learned something that was literally greatly surprising to me. Although he might not look like it, or behave like it, he has also set up an additional YouTube channel, this time called Huff Paranormal. It's not the usual type of paranormal channel though. There seemed to be about one video per week or so, going bac

If I don’t get access back to my old account, I will almost surely do something bad to myself

I forgot about too much

I've experienced enough hate in my life towards me that I want to be dangerous person!!!

What's this rumor about me being a paedophile?! Seriously seems like people trying to destroy me and get me killed by someone!!!

Much of my life isn't controlled by me. Sounds crazy, but  is true no matter how crazy. It was never my idea.

I've seen bad Facebook posts that were really meant to be memes or jokes but I don't get anything out of them because I literally have been feeling bad just like the memes/jokes have depicted, like no joke.

The major world powers, such as China & Russia, are probably not possible to defeat by the United States because the US has been unsuccessful in Syria. So much nations are not thankful to the US, by the way:The US has had so much military bases around the world though, so is it really difficult to understand the other nations?!

Okay, so music is one of those things, as well as getting messaged, that can make me slightly excited or happy, but I need a little more. Myself getting happy, It's like only one percent or less of what it normal.

I'm clueless about anything. I want to hurt my enemies because of my emotions, deadly to me . I don't know the future: what is coming, or how it is to happen. I don't want to hurt myself or die because of others. I want to instead hurt my enemies before that time comes for me. Depressed and sad people can commit suicide, but I don't want that for myself, I want to conquer the source of such thoughts!!! It's not my depression or emotion, it's people who are the source of all of my misery!!! Why doesn't anyone ever listen to me?.

I'm most happy and active when everyone's gone, when the days get cold, empty, and dark (rather than when it's warm and sunny, with millions of people on this world). Because that's when I'm tempted the most, to help make for a perfect world.

" I just want to shine. I want to climb to the top of a mountain. I want to get up, stay up-stay up out of my head because it's dangerous."

Sometimes, it can be difficult to decide what the weather is supposed to be. During the vivid fall colors, some of you might want spring to come back, and some of you might want fall to prevail throughout the upcoming months, while another part of you might want alternating weather. And at times, when it's this difficult to decide, sometimes the weather seems to try to decide for me, other times the weather might go along with my emotions. Whether or not the weather actually responds indirectly to my emotions to an extent is up for debate, you know?

I want to get ecstatic, get hyped, and elevate the senses for the euphoria...only to want to die afterwards

I wish that I could rise up, along with my own rule and my own vast lands, to bring morality and other positives to the world. Too bad that I'd need to make allies with enemies though.

I found a music band who's pattern & musical structure aren't outstanding by any means. I see the potential for greatness though, given that the vocals are great. It's called Fitz & The Tantrums.

My soul might not exist as real, but essentially it does, and it comes from a perfect place, and it's been put here on Earth and I can't reach a resolve. I can't make people help me, in a place that's too far from perfect, you know? Apart from this, If it wasn't Schizophrenic-like thoughts, I'd be more lost and it's the only aspect of reality keeping me from ending it all.

I can't have what I want, and I've been chasing various desires,  the allure of having them. Most of all, it's the life that I wanted that's what I've been taught is what I need. It's difficult to imagine life being different that perfect. 

Schizophrenic-like thoughts can make me feel calm, especially if I can make them reality!!!

Some people might want inappropriate stuff from life, such as being able to give the wrong advice to people, usually strangers (many of which might even be underage) on live video chat. But listen, some people just want to scroll social media without notifications or ads!!!

I went to bed at night, thinking to myself, "I want to die. I want the suffering to stop. I don't want to be a part of this world." and sometime during the lonely night, I had a dream that from my perception lasted literally for days. And during that dream, I did experiments and watched as equations appeared, seeming to describe most of everything perfectly. And I found myself with students attending school, and showing them proof of my experiments using videos of the entire events, and I found myself exuberant with surprise as to well my life is explained now. I might have dreamed of something that night which might be of great use to society or science, and my life might have stopped being meaningless on that night. After awaking, I thought about the equations and experiments from my dream, and yes, they did seem to explain much of reality as we've been seeing it. Could it be the theory of everything?

The area of the temperature map of my region of the world, about to be blue. On this map is shown shortly after midnight in my region (Michigan), while it's about three hours later in Greenland & essentially about six hours earlier or 18 hours later in the Russian Far East, otherwise known as Siberia. Take a look at these archived photos. My exact area is on the Southern area of the Southern peninsula, surrounded on three sides by the great lakes. Over the past three or more years, freezes or temperature of 32 degrees (0 degrees C) have come during some time during the 22nd of October. In 2019, the levels of water in the lakes is unusually high, but also cooler than normal to some extent, an interesting environmental feature to note. Some states including Colorado & Montana have had a temperature of 14 degrees (-10 C) or colder. The state of North Dakota has had snow, and even Minnesota has started to receive snowfall during Friday or Saturday. Today, snow has been fal

My mind feels corrupted because it's like a computer in a sense. But it's been like a computer that's been destroyed in various ways, with the data staying intact, letting my secrets become public. That's a detailed description of my life.

Love is like paradise supposedly. But my life is supposedly a sad way to live. 

Feeling awkward sometimes, during which I might get sleepy and pass out before the awkwardness and strange life makes me die

I want to get in the zone very often, but can't because every time, something such as an uncomfortable situation needs to get in the way, people need to get insanely mad at me and/or other stuff. There never seems to be a way out of such situations, except to lose my mind by listening to music and entering trances, the latter which is difficult to do unaided.

It's not comfortable being with so much people in tightly confined spaces, congestion & chaos & insane people, while being annoyed & confused as well as distracted by wonderful looking people!!! Knowing you can be killed any second by someone's looks who's insane, needing to talk to everyone (and getting into relationships with all of the good looking people) or else the worst will happen and that you've been traumatized by past experiences, is all a combination that easily can lead to a situation in which you yourself can go insane. This is what happened to me at the store, and it has felt like I needed hardcore drugs just to cope slightly with everything going on in my mind as well as physically. And fate has seemed to put me into such situations as much as possible.

Glacier National Park of Montana is quite nice, scenically speaking, but it doesn't stand out much from other places in my perspective. There's a reason I'd like to go there though, and it's the extremely expensive telescope that's been installed there in August of 2019, & it's possible to view the sky on a large mirror instead of a tiny eyepiece, which is actually how telescope viewing should be. I usually don't look through a telescope anymore, because of the small eyepiece, but photography is still something I can do.

Why does Friday need to pass so quickly?!

Often, when the season outside becomes different than normal, something seems off. For example, when the first cooler temperatures of the season come at night, and it gets very quiet. But it's a known thing that it's normal, but it doesn't seem that way, given how suddenly it seems to happen these times

An update on the weather in my local area: After not much or no difference in temperatures during the autumn season of 2019, until October 12, when the weather has started to get cooler, and freeze watches and/or warnings are likely to come early (there might have been about two this season), as evident by the forecast: What if I might update this every ten days or so? Good idea or not?

First of all, I don't know why a bygone is what it is and why I never get the chance to settle it once and for all. I went to Facebook and saw practically nothing: no replies, no digital messages, no notifications, etc., and because of this, the next thing on my mind is to at least take drugs to fill the void of silence, honestly enough. I don't take drugs, but they have sounded tempting many times, especially when the world is silent to me.

Occultists. Stumbling in the dark in rural areas, especially with long nights upon us, is so terrifying to me that it's terrifying to even think about. And to add to that, in the fall and winter it can also be extremely terrifying with the temperatures being cooler and almost all vegetation being gone. Something about this thought in particular doesn't seem to go away for anyone who starts to think about it, no matter who you are. But it seems to me that it's something that needs to be done to overcome life, walking in the dark in various conditions through forests and fields, even though the night might last all of the time: it's something that the mind has the urge to experience so that it can conquer, you know? Sometimes, you might come past a quote or movie such as "All Dogs Go To Heaven", and if you know the movie enough, emotions can instill terror in you and leave you traumatized, but nothing compares to walking the country alone!!!!

I tried to say bye to the world years ago, so that I could be left alone, but no one listened. I've said many stupid things, some of which I might not remember at this time, but people need to understand that I can't go back in time and fix them so they need to stop making me suffer by being silent and never trying to resolve the past in the present time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LhRgfFn5nhk

The various ways which people have tried to stop the hurt, the various ways that I tried,

Most of everything that I try to do in life is always a "No" from life, it always ends up incorrectly or leads to bad stuff happening to me eventually. Always a price to pay. Is that truly life? Does it normally work that way?

Thinking back to people who've died or gotten killed, I've thought about myself: that could've been me! If I died today for some reason, I would die a life that was totally unfair and unjust, constantly trying to figure out what was wrong in life, and how it was possible to change it, as well as why it was the way it was. People have left me behind by many miles, not physically but mentally, and I've found myself drifting alone looking distantly in all directions, with a good enough life being so far away that I'll never reach it. I know it's not true, but at the same time it is, because I don't know why. And if I don't know why now, I'll never find out or become smarter than who I already am.

I'm convinced that my later life is a punishment for the fact that I haven't changed the people around me or changed the world (at least the world around me) after I myself was degraded by people, and because I haven't made a difference (I never had any chance) to make the world a better place for the future and for people in the future, is why people have deemed me a failure. But in so many situations when I was berated and destroyed mentally by people, I found it impossible for some reason to react and/or say anything, although I did have the capacity in other situations to do so. Without any exaggeration, it's quite literally true that people have seemed to make me enter a state of mind in which I had no power, even though it might sound crazy it was like magic to me. The things people have been teaching their kids can also be at play here, not just the people who've caused outright harm to others. And the people who've been causing me mental damage would lik

Who's decision is it to take some people out of this world while others get to live out their life?!

Back when I was in school, I used digital monitors and a device that when activated could respond and there were so mang things that could happen in there, including glitches and malfunctions: those were cool devices, as you might know. Computers are devices that are astounding, but surprisingly enough, i haven't used one in years. I That's why I thought back to them and the vrazy amount of stuff that can happen to them!!!! I've been missing the various icons, malfunctions and else tha

I felt good but then I lost anything to do that could bring me pleasure

The only stuff I got correct in my life was to live correctly, but it's not like anyone is willing enough to understand the concept.

 it's about the 5th of October and Feels like right about the time during the first of March as the first of March usually has felt in Michigan; about 20 days or nearly three weeks before the start of spring, 60 degrees maximum today, sun low in the sky, 40 degrees as an overnight minimum, etc. Who these days ever thinks about this stuff besides me? Also, what if the Earth starting to tilt back in Fall as the trees still in color, going from fall into spring or summer?!

"Life is paradise"

for me a part of life is eternally missing: well being. But for everyone who knows me, it’s apparently a good thing because apparently I can be treated like I’m invisible. I often have wondered what Life for me could be like if well being existed for me. Religion might teach me that I will get it later in life or in the afterlife, but I don’t trust religion as a way for me to be safe, because religion offer me a false sense of safety. Besides religion, I have a false sense of security from the things that I’ve been told by other people but also what people have tried to do in my favor. My own Life is nothing more than a joke, at least to many people. In the end, I am most likely just a statistic, with no legacy or reason to have existed here and now

https://nypost.com/2019/10/03/aoc-is-a-wack-job-trump-trades-insults-with-bronx-dem/ Bastard said that we should eat babies. America is mentally ill nation. To do a stunt like that should be violence. Why don’t people start thinking before speaking?

Being silent is how my friends have responded to me, while I’ve been writhing and suffering from the ignorance

I get no true help from modern day people in this day and age because to them, much seem good and full of optimism, you know? It’s actually just a cruel excuse

I have a major problem right now, it’s not cancer or a mental illness or anything like that, but instead it’s a condition called life. The side Effects include but aren’t limited to: being disowned, having nightmares, wanting everything at once (because I know that I might die by accident or by tragedy at any Time) but not getting it, being worthless, being abandoned, and waiting a lifetime knowing why or even how things are the way they are. My condition has been viewed by many as treatable, and in theory should work but in practice this doesn’t make it any better.

Many people might think of me as naïve and an idiot on a constant basis, because of the distorted way which they've been taught here in the United States and as a result how cruel their thoughts are about me, without empathy, probably wishing me dead

We don't think profoundly enough for what's possible for us. We should think enough so that we can have time to appreciate the times when lack of all thought brings a sense of relief, and relax.

The false sense of everything being settled and okay is something that all of us are guilty of. But it's also the false sense of everything about reality seeming to be finally explained that makes us think that we need not go beyond what we already know. Intelligence is limited to us and our minds are lazy, we don't get to the reason behind it all, of why we exist. Many of us also have a false sense of security offered by religion.

Everyone who ever lives is ultimately, essentially, a failure. They are merely taught by society to think otherwise. Life is good, but only to the extent that it's essentially a made up reality in the minds of those who are willing to accept it only to an extent

I'm alive, and no one wants to feel good about it. In other words, one day, you get put out into the world and you're left with no one who cares about you, and that's how life is: a failed system

I remember in the past, staying up very late over the course of a night and the next day doing something that required my mind to work profusely; and I thought to myself since then, why does this situation exert such a profound and great (rewarding) feeling on me? and why does it seem to happen that one time? Also, why did I fail at so much during that time, but still allow for the great feeling to overcome me? Sometimes, a person would like to immerse him/herself in a specific emotional state that he or she has discovered for the first time, but as in my experience, in trying to explore the feeling more profoundly, one that might happen only once and never again, only scratches the surface and thus questions about it are never answered. The entire world seems like full of questions that are never answered, at least not using usual language.

I have a lack of many emotional & thought/mind altering experiences that are theoretically possible, and as such it all feels lost to me: my existence, my success, etc. Nothing ever comes of my life.

Feel like music is changing your state of mind? Besides music, how about the behavior of the physical world changing and rearranging physical objects? Personally, I'd like to work together with people to make it become reality.

I feel empty whenever I'm not at a very high functioning state of mind, and it seems like I might need something to get along with the time. It's not that I might be uninterested in everything, but instead, either being totally immersed in a great feeling or getting nothing at all from it. As long as there's doubt in my mind about an experience or feeling being perfect, I feel nothing from it, and I also don't gain anything from it. What if time itself could get along with me?

Something very major will likely happen today, September 4, and to be on the news, something involving a disaster. Maybe in Northern Europe

I don't know if we ever get anywhere by all of this searching for answers, unless we might think until we get to philosophy

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/technology/scientists-observe-mysterious-cosmic-web-directly-for-first-time/ar-AAIfZjm?ocid=spartanntp

I'm lost and alone but I don't feel bad at all. Life is a risk, all of the pain will likely all come to me eventually and my well being at the time of this writing is actually unexplained and not relevant to anyone

Failing in general is nothing for me, I failed alone and I could feel failure by my emotions

I don't like problems, forgetting one of them can put me in a bad situation.

Thinking of stuff ever deeper is like staying healthy, but for the mind. It's like everything starts to make sense, after sense itself can become inferior. Initially sense goes away and true sense of reality comes along

StuckStuck on ⛅ not knowing what time of the year it is, wondering to myself, "will we ever know if the sunlight is exactly as bright as it should be?" Meanwhile we don't know if anything is the way it's supposed to be & the music playing in our minds is the only thing, distorting our minds, & convincing us that everything is perfection & not worrying about anything except our current life. But someday we might pay greatly for all of this, and it's not perfect by any means

I might discover one day how to possibly change things for the better and the why of everything but by that time it will be too late, past my own lifetime. How's it possible to rearrange the life situations?

I discovered a song called Paradise, by Wild Nothing

Materialism is generally a bad thing, philosophical thoughts aren't

I've decided to finally decide what headphones to get, the Backbeat Pro 2. There was also the Sony mdr-x650bt to choose from. Much more recently, in late September some intriguing earbuds were announced for pre order and i became consequently interested and they were the Soundcore Liberty 2 Pro. It's disappointing that my headphones don't have an app to customize sound though.

When thinking about a planet where conditions are much better than 🌎, the feeling on the planet is like experiencing the greatest highs available on Earth, like listening to great speakers on full volume and immersing yourself in laser light shows and such