My major condition

I have a major problem right now, it’s not cancer or a mental illness or anything like that, but instead it’s a condition called life. The side Effects include but aren’t limited to: being disowned, having nightmares, wanting everything at once (because I know that I might die by accident or by tragedy at any Time) but not getting it, being worthless, being abandoned, and waiting a lifetime knowing why or even how things are the way they are. My condition has been viewed by many as treatable, and in theory should work but in practice this doesn’t make it any better.