I feel like I have no friends left

To be honest, I feel like I'm bored and without any friends left. I don't learn anything from life, I don't gain anything positive from my experiences, and I've been taught by distorted minds, who've tried to convince me that life should only be about focusing on the positives. I've frequently been thinking about how boring and mundane it is inside and out, and I want to die. I've been having serious trouble for a long time, regarding work, and my friends and family probably think that I'm a lazy bum. I've been hated on, despised, and everyone would probably wipe me off of the face of the Earth as soon as they could get the chance: in fact, it's very likely that if they had that chance, no matter what they were up to, that's the first thing that they'd do. But on the other hand, hanging out with friends is no better than hanging with family, because I don't share the same interests and views as them. I feel like a fucking outcast who everyone wants to beat up, physically and psychologically. Random smells can bring me back the past times that I don't know what to make of, but ones that have made me feel unusually good. I don't handle time very well; it's my enemy for the most part: every time and every feeling that has made me happy, keeps passing me, and it's like I've been severed from the past. No one wants to participate and bring the past back, no one wants to coordinate their efforts into greatness, but this is the world that I live in. I've been getting happiness, and feeling great, from things that just about everyone would find bizarre (to say the least). Thinking about bizarre and unusual stuff is what makes me live, and I have yet to find anyone who can accept that part about me.