How I'm doing, and why my message is urgent as fuck

Honestly, after watching a YouTube video about how people are doing, I've realized that I'm not feeling good as of now, and also not feeling bad; I don't feel anything about my life; I seemingly don't care about anything. It's like a feeling of being numb; I suppose that it's my way of cancelling out emotion that has resulted in this situation. And as I've been writing profusely, I don't want to be an emotional person, because I don't want to have anything to do with that (emotion), after realizing that it's a dangerous and potentially deadly spiral. For goodness sake, I know that so much people don't care, but I care because I know too much that not everyone, not even me, might get to see tomorrow. I'm still a person, but I could die by freak accident, and I want things figured out as soon as possible. Therefore, don't cause bad stuff, because it can create emotion. Emotion can lead to a situation, one that can lead to a person wanting to hurt himself or herself; there's never time for that! If you understand, please let me know somehow.

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