Everything led me to have a bad life

Why is it that since people have done bad stuff to me, treated me like a piece of shit, that things have gone awry in my life? I mean, I've had bad relations with just about anyone who I've met, even though I've been nothing but nice to them, and most of them being people who I've seen for the first time in my life. Also, bad luck seems to have followed me everywhere, causing nothing but additional trauma to me. Why is it that I've gotten blamed for just about everything, even though I've been extra cautious? For example, my parents, not even knowing that I've been treated bad by people, have blamed me for all of their troubles and problems; in particular, when we went on vacation, I was looked down upon extremely critically and made to virtually feel no good, at any time? I wish that I hadn't taken on any travelling, but I had no choice, as I was forced to. All that I've been doing in life, is literally worthless. Because of my bad luck and misfortune, I can only expect the unfortunate. It's actually very sad, a very sad life for sure. I wish that the life of mine could be put into context and that people would finally realize how bad it's been. It's not anything special; there's not really anything good about it. Sure, things have seemed to be good at times, but what of it, if there have also been equally as many bad times to negate the good? This is where life doesn't make sense to me; Throughout my life, I've kept asking myself "why?", and why is it that I'm a bad person? Throughout this whole journey, that is called my life, I've felt practically nothing but punished all of the time. I feel like an addict; not to drugs, violence or sex; but to vengeance. And I can't get any of it. It hurts every day. I can't go about doing anything in life and be happy with it; I've really tried, but it's just not happening. Everything seems to be so screwed up. I'm afraid that there's no sense in even describing how it all is. It's not people who have been treating me like a piece of shit, it's also reality and life, which I've been often told is the most precious and important thing that one can have. People have almost always given me an ominous feeling. With some people, it has felt literally like being about to be hit by a tsunami. Fear, as well as pain, knows no limits, unfortunately; and I think that's one major aspect that people simply fail to understand or grasp about my life. How can this go on, if I'm constantly in misery? One should not do bad things, but I've got this inner addiction to do just that; the major problem with that, however, is that I no longer am present with those people who deserve it...